Healing from Shame

One of the most significant milestones in healing from shame is shifting from judging to understanding yourself. This way of seeing myself defused my shame and freed me from judging others. I learned to stop judging my thoughts, feelings and behaviours, and understand them instead. Here are some examples: Shame Mindset #1: Sleeping in means […]

Through my eyes: Weight loss surgery

I grew up in a dysfunctional and abusive family where food was my escape. Even the shortest walk left me breathless, sweaty, and fatigued. Genetics was not on my side, as both my mother and father struggled with obesity and diabetes. Mum used food as a means of emotional comfort, and food was the main […]

Loving yourself

For a long time, I thought that a person who enjoys being with themselves was narcissistic. My mum had been taught that self-love was self-centred and egotistical. She believed that single people were selfish. She did not know how to love herself, much less teach her children. To compensate for my lack of self-love I […]

Personal Responsibility

In a previous post I discussed the tricky walk of personal responsibility. For me it was difficult to traverse this path in my life. In fact, learning to take responsibility of my own life without taking on the role of a victim has been one of my greatest achievements. I had been victimised many times, […]

“I think the reward for conformity is that everyone likes you except yourself.”

American writer and activist, Rita Mae Brown wrote, “I think the reward for conformity is that everyone likes you except yourself.” Conformity is our default method of gaining acceptance. We force ourselves to be what others want. Then, we feel ashamed about what differs from their expectations. It is a common theme in any system […]

Obesity is not a sin but a symptom

Society treats obesity as moral failure. This is a myth which I tackle in my upcoming book. People see it as slothfulness, a lack of motivation and poor self-control. Religion extends this as disobedience to God. This was far from the truth in my life. I sought comfort and food was the closest substitute. My […]

Self-compassion is the catalyst to overcoming our self-harming behaviours.

Self-compassion is the catalyst to overcoming our self-harming behaviours. All permanent change begins on the inside. It takes time for our efforts to affect our behaviours. My journey has been about learning to love myself. It has been a life long journey where I have worked on my self-sabotaging attitudes. We all have negative thoughts […]

OVERCOMING OBESITY: ONE WOMAN’S INTENSE JOURNEY FOR FITNESS

Growing up in a dysfunctional and abusive family, food was my escape. Genetics were not on my side either. Both my mother and father struggled with obesity and diabetes. Mum used food as a means of emotional comfort. Food was the main way we related as a family. It was the answer to everything in […]

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