As the child in my family who was much younger than my siblings, I have lived with the feeling that I am less than others. Always too young, too immature, and too late, I was left out of family decisions. Sadly, it has taken me many years to work out that while it may have been true in my younger years, it is no longer true now that I am lagging behind everyone else.
Through my journey out of these core beliefs I learned that we all have a facade which we present to others. I have pressured myself to live up to the image we all want the world to see rather than what lurks behind it. Each of us hides our true self in some way from others, some live entrenched in deep fear, presenting only a well refined image to those surrounding them. Many of these are the more successful, having used this technique to influence their way to the top of their careers, rather than developing the skills needed to perform in their position. I have envied these individuals, as I could never be as good as their façade, nor could I present myself in this way.
What I have discovered is that the pressure I have been putting on myself has been unnecessary because I have competed with an illusion, a projected image of who the person wanted to be rather than who they truly were. Enter the authentic self where we present what we really are underneath. Here there is no room for bluffing, manipulating, or lying. It is in this place that we are the person the world sees and there is no other self.
The point of this post is to say that if you are pressuring yourself to keep up with the Joneses, be aware that they are not revealing all the information behind their image. Instead of improving themselves, they choose to cover up their inadequacies.
Scratch beneath the surface and you will discover that we all have the same fears and insecurities.
With whom are you competing?
In love, Jenny
