Last weekend I took part in a retreat where I spoke. It was a great weekend reconnecting with others from my hometown. Old feelings reared their head which got me going over the past.
Inadequacy was one of my strongest feelings in the early years, mostly because I was so much bigger than anyone I knew. This held me back from achieving and living my life fully. I am not the only one who has struggled with feelings of inadequacy. But where do they come from?
Our ego is that part of us which identifies who we are. It helps us define ourselves by what we do, what we own and how others treat us. But we are individually much more than this. We feel incomplete and think our happiness is determined by an outcome which we believe we can control.
My life was driven by the belief that I was lacking because of my weight. I believed, I could lose weight and no longer be bullied or feel inadequate if I had control. This was my treadmill and if I had control of my weight, I would no longer be inferior.
But nothing could be further from the truth. No matter how much weight l lost, the feelings of inadequacy did not lessen. In fact, as I focussed on the approval of others for my weight loss, my fear of inadequacy increased. I told myself that obesity made me incomplete and outsourced my happiness by seeking the approval of others rather than finding peace within myself.
There is another way of viewing life. What would love say?
Love would say that I was adequate just as I was, and because of this I had within me the means to make my life the best it could be. In moving from my mind to my heart, I learned that I was adequate. I am the best version of myself. There is no one else like me and I am okay just as I am.
You see, there is no comparison. No one is like you and there will never be another like you. You are unique and we need someone just like you to complete our lives. Be the best version of yourself.
If you would like help to find your best self, message me.
In love, Jenny