Dreamy and I have just returned from a few days away. We stayed with a close friend in the Adelaide Hills, South Australia. While away, we walked different trails, went for coffees and puppachinos and caught up with family and friends.
Often, going away is a catalyst for me to heal and change. Being in a different environment with different relationships gives me a different perspective of life. I have a close relationship with my friend, and we share our thoughts freely. We have been there for each other through our toughest times. She stood beside me as I worked my way out of an emotional and physical hole. Her belief in me has kept me sane many times.
While away, I caught up with another close friend with whom I attended university almost 40 years ago. At that time, I was still living with my family. Our conversation picked up where we had left it, as it does every time we speak. We discussed where our lives had been and our thoughts and feelings about it all. I value these friendships. Although I have not always been the kindest friend, they have stood by me, and vice-versa.
Taking a short break from our reality can be a reset. We tend to get caught in our world and trapped in unhealthy thought patterns. This trip refreshed my mind and soul, it gave me a different way of seeing my experiences, and I was open to see them differently. As I shared with my friends while outside of my normal world, I was able to take on a fresh perspective.
Sometimes, we need to take time from our busy life to connect with those who know us best. We need to hear the voices of those who love us to reassure our heart that we are okay. We need to walk in different places, feel a different atmosphere and soak it all in. Because sometimes we need to reset.
Do you need to reset? Do you need to see life in a fresh way? Message me if you want to chat.
In love, Jenny
It’s Mother’s Day here in Australia. I’d like to wish every one of you a happy day. I do hope you have enjoyed time with your loved ones.
For many of us, Mother’s Day is a hard day. Perhaps your mother is no longer here, you cannot see her on the day, or you are estranged from her. Perhaps you are a mother who cannot see your children on the day. Perhaps you have never had children, or you have lost a child.
This can make the day a difficult one. Feelings of abandonment and loneliness arise and hearing about Mother’s Day celebrations makes the pain worse.
Mostly, I feel sadness on this day. I lost the mother I knew 37 years ago, and I have no children to call my own. Mother’s Day holds little meaning for me except the vague memories of my relationship with her.
Dreamy, my faithful greyhound, has been a real comfort for me over the last 5 years. I guess my relationship with him goes some way to compensating for my lack of children. Having the ability to love someone and take care of them has added to my life greatly. He may not be able to bring me breakfast in bed, or say Happy Mother’s Day, but I have someone to cuddle who loves me back.
If you are without others on this day, I hope you have a furry friend to love, too. Please message me if you want a chat.
In love, Jenny
Today it is 5 years since I adopted my man, Dreamy. I never knew I could get so close to another being. He is such a huggable and kissable boy that I smother him daily. I adore him. It was one of the best decisions of my life. Love you big boy!
One of my favourite things to do is to walk with my greyhound, Dreamy. I am fortunate to live in a regional area where there is easy access to open countryside. One of our favourite places is the Blue Lake, a natural volcanic lake.
Mornings are not my best time of day. My best times are in the evening when I do much of my work. However, I find walking in the mornings to be meditative. Surrounded by nature I can engage in my surroundings and while pounding the pavement I work out my frustrations and find the inner freedom to start my day.
Much of the walk is dictated by Dreamy’s obsession with sniffing every tree and post, getting pats, interspersed with his ablutions! We meet lots of people along the way with whom we chat. Dreamy often sidles up for a cuddle. Of course, he loves the attention, and I must admit that I enjoy the attention he gets.
When we have finished walking, I am refreshed and relaxed, and Dreamy spends the remainder of the day sleeping on my bed.
How do you wind down? Do you like walking? I find that walking is not only a great way to exercise but it is also good for me psychologically.
If you want to chat about developing an exercise routine which suits you, contact me.
In love, Jenny
My life has been one of profound change. Not only has my weight reduced significantly but I have also had an enormous psychological shift. From morbid obesity to a healthy weight, poor health, and potential early death to the healthiest I have ever been, depression and anxiety to peace and happiness, loneliness to wholeness; each of these changes have occurred from a psychological shift.
As I sit in my chair, enjoying the garden, I count myself lucky to be in this place. Greenery surrounds me, birds are twittering, fish are nibbling at their food, Dreamy is standing by me for a cuddle and I am healthy. What more could I want? It is true that I work in my garden, I love my dog, live a healthy lifestyle and all this beauty has not just materialised out of thin air. But none of this would have occurred without a psychological shift.
What was the catalyst for this change? Given there are many who never overcome feelings of hopelessness and despair, why has my life changed so much? I have often wondered this myself.
Those who do not know my history say that I am more fortunate. Many have speculated that there must be something about me which is different from others. Others have said that it is because I have the benefit of a close friend who is a medical professional.
Perhaps all of this is true, but the defining part of any change is motivation. Admittedly, some of my motivation has been fuelled by fear of becoming like my mum who died at an early age. But fear alone is a poor motivator. Knowledge alone is not sufficient for change, but motivation enables change.
So, what motivated me? It was hope in the form of love. I experienced a goodness which guided me out of the misery of my past. You see, there is always hope. No matter where you find yourself today, tomorrow can be the start of a new beginning. Maybe you can only manage a small step forward, but that step may be the start of positive change for you. As I have learned, small steps are the best way forward.
Feel free to contact me for a chat.
In love, Jenny
Nearly 5 years ago I adopted my big boy, Dreamy the greyhound. From the beginning it was hard for me. I had lived alone for 30 years. My house was mine, and everything had a place – until I brought Dreamy home.
While we were on the 5-hour drive home, he got his pointy little nose into a bag of food and managed to consume 250 grams of mettwurst (smoked meat)! I was alerted by the strong smell of garlic coming from the back seat.
Within the first few minutes of arriving home he drank from the fishpond and peed on my precious purple rose bush. The assault on my home continued when he ventured inside where he peed on an ottoman and jumped on my precious, clean bed.
After changing my life to accommodate my new partner, we managed to forge some peace at home, albeit only when I was there. In my absence he ripped apart 4 beds, tore a leather bag, scratched the walls and chewed the door frames in the laundry where I gave him access from the outside.
He was ruining my home but taking my heart. Eventually I realised with some help from his vet, that he had separation anxiety and we put him on some medication. He wanted me, to be with me, to smell me, to see me and for me to give him attention. I let him inside to sleep on my bed when I was away and arranged for him to be with someone a couple of days a week. Thankfully, he has bonded with this person who is one of his other favourite people. He only pees inside infrequently nowadays.
My main lesson from this has been to be calm and persistent, above all to love. Dreamy was feeding off my anxiety about having a dog for the first time in my life. I learned to be calm around him and calm him with love and affection. Now we are best buddies, and we adore each other. He loves sleeping on my bed, cuddles on the couch together, having his bum rubbed, puppachinos, long walks around the lake, meeting with his special people and roast chicken.
I never gave up on him and I am so glad I didn’t. In the same way, I am so glad my closest friends never gave up on me when they first met me. Because I was much like Dreamy, afraid to be alone, homeless, feeling unloved and behaving badly.
Never give up.
In love, Jenny
Last month I was the keynote speaker at the main dinner for the Whyalla Wellness Weekend. I am grateful for the invitation to speak. Below is his review of my speech. Thank you again Peter!
Jenny is the real deal.
I am so grateful to have connected with Jenny and that she so generously took the up the offer to be our keynote speaker at the main dinner event as part of the Whyalla Wellness Weekend held in October 2022.
Jenny spoke from her unique and heartfelt experience and was able to share the lessons from that experience with eloquence, compassion and encouraging directness.
The audience immediately warmed to Jenny and were moved to tears at times as she shared the challenges she faced, overcame and continues to overcome.
The table of men that I sat on were intently quiet as Jenny spoke and were in awe of the presence she held while at the lectern. There was an incredible sense of respect for the woman that Jenny chose to become despite many opportunities to throw in the towel and resign herself to a lesser life.
Jenny received a heartfelt and deserved applause as she sat down after her keynote.
It is necessary to mention that the audience could have listened to Jenny for as long as Jenny wanted to share as they were captivated at the uniqueness of Jenny’s story and her strength to rally herself despite the tough hand life had initially dealt her.
From the Whyalla Wellness community and from me personally; thank you Jenny for being the person that you are and sharing your story with us. Your story has immense transformational potential for all who are blessed enough to hear you speak.
I wholeheartedly and positively endorse Jenny as a wonderfully and refreshingly down to earth and authentic keynote speaker.
In health and wellness,
Peter Borda
The Wellness Centre Whyalla
https://www.thewellnesscentrewhyalla.com.au/
Recently, the ABC aired a segment about discrimination by health professionals for body size. It was reported that many of us with weight issues avoid visiting a doctor for fear of being judged.
Fat shaming is a real thing. Over my life I have been bullied many times because of my size. There was no getting away from it as my shape and size made me stand out from others. My sisters who were nurses often told me horror stories about how the obese were viewed by medical professionals. They also said that they and their patients were treated with disdain.
For this reason, I avoided visiting a medical clinic of any form until my mid-thirties. It wasn’t until my closest friend gently convinced me to have a check for genetically passed down health issues that I visited a clinic. It is an understatement to say I was afraid. I feared the worst – bullying by those who were supposed to help me. But I have been fortunate as my local doctors have treated me with kindness and understanding. However, this was not always my experience.
I visited two specialists in the city to help me with stomach pains. Although I had lost a significant amount of weight, I was treated as a sub-standard human being. The first specialist was obviously uncomfortable with my size during the consultation. Two weeks before scheduled keyhole surgery she phoned me to tell me she could not go through with the operation. Apparently, the beds were not wide enough in the hospital where she worked, and she was afraid of litigation. The next specialist was willing to operate but took it upon himself to lecture me about my weight. He also informed me that my cholesterol levels were slightly raised. God knows what he would have said had I seen him at my largest! And I’m not sure how my weight influenced the pain.
Here is the link for the ABC segment: https://fb.watch/gu53cOrNWy/
Have you experienced discrimination for your weight? Contact me for a chat.
In love, Jenny
Dreamy and I travelled over 2,000 km from our home near the southern most part of South Australia to Whyalla, north of Adelaide and Port Lincoln three hours south of Whyalla. The first two nights were spent in the Adelaide Hills with a close friend. Then we were off to catch a ferry for a two-hour trip over the Spencer Gulf from the small town of Wallaroo to Lucky Bay on the Eyre Peninsula. Dreamy and I cuddled on the deck as we watched the ocean go by. We made some new friends and shared contact details.
From here we travelled about an hour north to Whyalla for two nights to speak at a Wellness Weekend. It was great to share my journey to inspire people offering wellness services in the Eye Peninsula. I was given some very positive feedback about my talk. We stayed with another close friend where Dreamy got lots of attention. We also caught up with work colleagues I had not seen for over 10 years. Everyone loved Dreamy, they were also excited to see me healthy and happy. It was such a positive time that I have promised to visit again.
We then holidayed south of Whyalla in Port Lincoln where we stayed 5 nights in a charming one-bedroom cottage with a backyard perfect for Dreamy’s ablutions! We feasted on the local fresh seafood every day at least once (which I shared with Dreamy). Dreamy and I visited a local barista each day for coffee and puppachinos (luke-warm, frothy lactose free milk). We caught up with a friend living there and others on holiday. We walked near the ocean, up and down streets and walking tracks, travelled to a sanctuary called Whalers Way and relaxed.
On our way back to the ferry we visited Tumby Bay, a small holiday town where we had local fish again and I enjoyed some retail therapy. After two hours on the ferry, we landed back at Wallaroo and then stayed in Moonta with friends for the night. We took in the sights and shared coffee. Dreamy got lots of cuddles.
Finally, we stayed another three nights in the Adelaide Hills with our friend. Here Dreamy got very excited when he saw a rabbit and chased him around the streets.
We had a great time away. Dreamy was a star, he was wonderful company and loved by everyone we met. Now it is back to normality as I focus on setting up a wellness course.
I hope you enjoy the pictures taken on my mobile phone. Thanks for reading our story.
In love, Jenny
