When I first adopted Dreamy, I had no idea what separation anxiety in dogs looked like. My intention had been to keep him out of the house when he was by himself. I left a comfortable bed for him in the laundry with rugs, food, and water. But upon returning from work, he met me with aggression.
Over time the behaviours worsened, he began chewing the door frames, ripping beds, pulling items down and ripping them apart, howling outside and other destructive behaviours. I tried some natural remedies and left one of my shirts on his bed in the laundry. The behaviour did not change. Tablets were prescribed for his anxiety which helped a little, I let him inside the house to my lay on my bed. But his anxiety continued when alone. He howled inside the house and peed on the furniture.
Anger filled me at first. My house had been my sanctuary until now; it was becoming a den of destruction. Then I began to see the similarities between his anxiety and mine. When I first moved here, I lived alone. My fear meant I saw negativity in everything. I imagined demons and struggled to focus on my work. The separation from my family was hard and the lack of contact dreadful. My life had completely changed and like Dreamy, I struggled with it. But then, someone gave me the love and support to find my own feet and helped me believe in love.
So, I tempered my reactions and showed compassion to this big, fawn greyhound. I soothed him with kind words, cuddles, and lots of love. It became a way of expressing gratefulness for what I had been given. I understood his anxiety and chose to connect with him. In the process I relived the healing I had experienced in my own life, and it softened me. I was reminded of the tenderness which had changed my life, and those who had listened to and heard my story rather than judging me.
So Dreamy and I share a common bond. We have both experienced trauma and we have both been changed my love.
Has love changed your life?
In love, Jenny
