Our thoughts affect our body. In fact, every thought produces a biochemical reaction. Thinking positively does not address the root causes of our negative thought patterns as our body knows when we do not believe what we are trying to tell ourselves.
Personally, I am a master of analysing negative situations repeatedly, and I am brilliant at catastrophising circumstances in my life. But I am working on changing these patterns. Just today I had a tummy ache from negative thinking. I managed to convince myself that I was developing another food intolerance to add to my list. When I was distracted from these thoughts, the pain left, and I felt much better.
Looking back, I can see that my early years of depression led to significant stomach problems later in life. Hence, my change in diet over the last 5 years. One of my weaknesses is worrying about what others think of me. I know I am not alone. Often people say that we should not worry about the opinions of others and that unless we value the person, their opinion should not matter to us. But this is not an easy task for many of us.
Our opinion reflects our personal experience. Often, the more deeply held opinions are rooted in trauma which we project onto others when we judge them. We tend to have an opinion, or bias about others when we are insecure. We judge both ourselves and others when we have unresolved issues. For many years I judged all men through the unresolved trauma in my childhood. Nowadays, I have a many, trusted male friends as more recent experiences have disproven that not all men are the same. Looking back, I see that the times in my life where my opinion was the strongest were those when I was most hurt.
So, instead of feeling the need to give everyone’s opinion headspace, remember that most are rooted in the other’s problems, not yours. In fact, letting go and not having an opinion can reflect maturity.
In love, Jenny
